Perfect Behavior (A Guide for Ladies and Gentlemen in All Social Crises) by Donald Ogden Stewart

Author:Donald Ogden Stewart [Stewart, Donald Ogden]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Etiquette -- Humor
ISBN: 9781404324275
Amazon: 1409982432
Publisher: IndyPublish
Published: 2002-07-16T18:30:00+00:00

{illustration caption = Nowhere is the etiquette of travel more abused than our subways. The gentleman shown above is en route to his fiancee's flat in the Bronx. He has neglected to purchase the customary bouquet for his intended and has offered his seat to the lady, who is standing, in exchange for her corsage bouquet. Should she accept the proposition without further ado, or should she request the guard to introduce the gentleman first?}

{illustration caption = The young lady has received an invitation to a quilting-bee from a Mrs. Steenwyck and, anxious to make a correct reply, she has bought a Complete Letter Writer to aid her to this end. To her surprise and dismay, she finds that it contains three model replies to such an invitation beginning "Dear Mrs. Peartree," "Dear Mrs. Rombouts," and "Dear Mrs. Bevy," and one invitation to a christening beginning, "Dear Mrs. Steenwyck," but no reply to an invitation to a quilting-bee beginning "Dear Mrs. Steenwyck." PERFECT BEHAVIOR settles such perplexities.}

{illustration caption = Crests or other armorial bearings on notepaper are no longer considered absolutely necessary to establish one's social position. Nevertheless, if one feels that note-paper that does not bear the family escutcheon is not quite all that note-paper should be, it is permissible to have it stamped neatly at the top of the first sheet. Care should be exercised to avoid selecting coats-of-arms that might be recognized, such as that of the United States or Great Britain. Rather solicit the taste of a good stationer than commit the blunders depicted above.}

BOXING IN AMERICAN SOCIETY

Although many of America's foremost boxers have been persons whom one would not care to know socially, yet much fun and pleasure can be had out of the "manly art" if practised in a gentlemanly manner.

"Boxing parties" are generally held in the evening. The ballroom of one's home can be pleasantly decorated for the occasion, with a square ring roped off in the centre surrounded by seats for the ladies and gentlemen who come as invited guests. Evening dress is usually worn.

The contests should be between various members of one's social "set" who are fond of the sport and can be counted on to remember at all times that they are gentlemen.

The matches should be arranged in tournament form, so that the winner of one bout meets the winner of the next bout, et cetera, until all but two have been eliminated. The boxer who wins this final contest shall be proclaimed the "champion."

Great fun can then be had by announcing that the "champion" will be permitted to box three rounds with a "masked marvel." The identity of this "unknown" (who is usually Jack Dempsey or some other noted professional pugilist) should be kept carefully secret, so that all the guests are in a glow of mystified excitement when the contest begins, and you can imagine their delight and happy enthusiasm when the "masked marvel" cleverly knocks the "champion" for a double loop through the ropes into the lap of some tittering "dowager.

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